Construction culture often discourages talking about feelings, but checking on a workmate takes less than five minutes and can genuinely save a life. You do not need training or the right words; you need to notice, ask and listen. This guide gives a simple, SA-appropriate approach. If your mate is in immediate danger, call the SADAG Suicide Crisis Helpline on 0800 567 567 or Lifeline SA on 0861 322 322, both free and 24 hours, or 10111 for SAPS in an emergency.
The "you OK?" conversation, step by step
- Find the right moment. Quiet time works best: end of day, walking to the bakkie, during a tea break away from the group. Not in front of others.
- Open with observation, not diagnosis. "Hey, I have noticed you have seemed a bit flat lately, you OK?" is far less confronting than "are you depressed?".
- Listen more than you talk. Resist the urge to fix it or offer solutions straight away. Being heard matters enormously. Nod, make eye contact, leave your phone alone.
- Ask the direct question if you are worried. "I want to ask, are you having any thoughts of hurting yourself, or of not wanting to be here?" It is uncomfortable, but the research confirms asking does not increase the risk.
- Point to help. Keep the numbers handy and share them without judgement.
- Follow up. A text the next day, such as "Thinking of you bru, hope today was better", costs nothing and means a lot.
SA crisis lines
These are free and answered 24 hours unless stated:
- SADAG Suicide Crisis Line: 0800 567 567.
- Lifeline SA: 0861 322 322.
- SADAG SMS line: 31393, if a call is not possible.
- SAPS emergency: 10111.
- Ambulance: 10177.
These numbers were verified as at June 2026. Please re-check them on the live page, as helpline numbers can change.
Most of the approach here draws on internationally recognised mental health first aid principles. SA-specific research on the effectiveness of peer-checking in construction is not available, so we are honest that the evidence base is general rather than SA-specific. The principle that a direct, caring question helps rather than harms is well established.
Common mistakes
- Asking in front of the crew. Privacy makes it safe for your mate to be honest.
- Jumping to fix it. Solutions come later. First, just listen.
- Dodging the direct question. If you are genuinely worried, ask plainly. Hinting leaves them isolated.
- One-and-done. A follow-up message the next day is often what turns a moment into real support.
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In crisis? SADAG 0800 567 567 ·